CATCH A LEOPARD BY THE TAIL
And don’t let go!
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I’m cursed.
When it comes to making decisions, that is.
Whether it’s planning a vacation, or buying a new laptop, I absolutely have to research the crap out of all my options first. It’s a compulsion. Some might call it a sickness. OK, that someone might be me.
This was as true for our once-in-a-lifetime dream trip to South Africa two years ago, as it was in my search for a new laptop last December.
The trip to South Africa was a surprise. Until then, an African wildlife safari had been more on the pipedream end of our bucket-list spectrum. But then friends floated the idea of a trip to Kruger National Park and the post-Covid tourist number-tumbles had created fertile ground for great bargains.
When it came to the search for a new laptop, I started with the idea of simply replacing the trusty ancient mariner of a machine I’d used, lo these past many years. Maalesef, as they say in Turkish, unfortunately, one of the problems of holding onto a piece of technology for too long, is that its replacement no longer exists. Suddenly, I was floating rudderless on uncharted seas.
Knowing me, before you could say, “Byte dance,” I had PC World articles and Consumer Reports, HP and Microsoft and Dell etc. sales sites, YouTube enthusiast and techno-blogger videos burning bytes into my avid retinas.
What’s the big deal, you might ask. I’m a writer. And let’s face it, the computing needs of writers are minimal—any machine that can run Word and connect to the internet should do.
Too bad, I’m also an artist, a digital graphics person. I need a high-res screen, a solid graphics card, a chugger of a chip, plenty of RAM, and loads of hard drive storage to store all my media files. Plus, I’m going to keep the damn thing for a decade, so it needs to last.
As for my effort to track down The Best Possible experience Kruger National Park had to offer, right away, I had multiple webpages open—travel sites like Let’s Go and Fodor’s and even Conde Nast Traveler, yeah, I know. And of course, Trip Advisor and Booking-dot-com and innumerable personal travel-blogs. At any given time, my poor iPad is burdened with more than thirty tabs squished into its digital width.
And this is what I learned.
Kruger itself isn’t the best. It’s overcrowded—multiple safari companies access a communal sighting channel that results in an armada of vehicles racing against each other through the park to get to a place before the sighted animal gets sick of the paparazzi and skedaddles. And the place shuts down at dusk. Night safaris are out.
BUT.
There is a whole constellation of satellite private parks attached to Kruger. Animals are free to cross their boundaries, people are not. I narrowed my search down to the perfect spot (with the perfect deals) and many months later, we were headed to the Timbavati Private Reserve.
The road from the airport cut through several other private reserves and offered up a veritable smorgasbord of visual appetizers which included sightings of an amorous lion couple,
and a peekaboo giraffe.
We were left salivating for more.
Upon reaching the lodge, we were quickly shown around the common area that served up gourmet food
and all the booze you could possibly drink. The outdoor deck even had a swimming pool where wild elephants could amble up and wet their lengthy whistles.
Then, we checked into our room,
but were told to return right away for our first safari. Here was the promise of the truly bucket-list-experience I’d only ever dreamed of.
We changed for the afternoon drive and before you could say, “Pass the binoculars, please,” were in an open-air vehicle
with our amazing guide and tracker,
and a young couple from Connecticut on their honeymoon. And the race was on to spot the big five (buffalo, elephant, leopard, lion, rhinoceros) and the little five (red-billed buffalo weaver, elephant shrew, leopard tortoise, antlion, rhinoceros beetle), but most importantly, the elusive leopard. Apparently, there had been a recent leopard-sighting drought and we were told it was an all-hands-on-deck situation.
On the computer front, my days of research led me to a brand I thought would be well out of my budget, until I got on the phone with a young, enthusiastic, sales rep.
And this is what I learned.
Sales reps have incredible leeway to push discounts and tweak combinations of features and accessories to get you your dream machine. So, OK, I spent days on the phone with the kid and was treated to multiple, less-than-optimal pitches, even an unsatisfactory machine I had to return. But finally, finally, I zeroed in on my dream machine with all the grunt I needed to produce gorgeous graphics and store them onsite. Best of all, between the Christmas sales rush, and the rep’s discount, it fit my budget, just about, like a shirt stretched to the max across a burgeoning belly.
“Remember,” the rep said. “You won’t get it till the beginning of the new year.”
“No worries,” I cheerily replied, patting myself on the back for the incredible deal I’d just scored, while praying my old venerable veteran machine would hold out till Jan. 4.
That first safari drive in Timbavati lasted almost five hours, well past dark. We were treated to all sorts of wildlife
—
No, no leopard.
Yet…
But our most thrilling sighting took place inside our room. Where there was no landline phone, no cellphone coverage, and we were the last chalet out, farthest away from the main lodge.
At around midnight. After we’d had too much to eat and way more to drink. I was pulling the mosquito netting shut around the bed as I’d been instructed to do…
And there it was.
To be continued… Come back next week for Part Two of Catch a Leopard by the Tail!
Awesome Rilla!! Thanks for sharing your experiences!! Miss you & Satish!!